Affection is Desirable. Money is Indispensable!

This delicious quote is uttered by Mrs. Austen in the film, “Becoming Jane” as she tries to reason with her daughter accept the proposal from the rich booby. As way back then, the only way out for women was through marriage and when you are poor, like the Austen’s was, then you can’t really be picky about whom you choose to marry.

While fortunately things have gotten better, had Jane Austen been born today she would no doubt be able to go to University on scholarship, then met many fellows who would challenge her mind. After graduation she could work, be independent thus not relying on others for sustenance. So even if she does fall for a poor fella, it wouldn’t really matter since both of the would be able to work their way up and it is very common for both wife and husband to be working these days.

But, sadly, in certain circles money still a deciding factor on accepting marriage proposals even today. Seem unthinkable. But very true. Those that are very poor and very rich definitely considers that as the deal breaker. My mother once related a conversation she had with a businessman. He felt sorry for his brother because their parents didn’t like it that he had fall for a poor woman. After further inquiries, it turned out that her parents didn’t own factories and was not a high ranking official or management, but in all likelihood were not destitute, ie, they were just ordinary family. His parents didn’t approve of the match because she would bring nothing to their business, no merging of factories or insider help in business. There are people who definitely matchmaking their children solely on the basis of the family, he’s so and so son, she’s so and so daughter, they would be a good match! Natch!

While it is true that money is indispensable, life definitely be easier with it than without it, without affection life would be very dry indeed. Still, if you marry solely on affection, it could turn sour very soon once the reality of life sets in what with kids, housing, health and education prices keep getting higher and higher. So, what to do? How do you choose the one?

For me, the answer is back to faith. Faith will guide you. So first make sure you’re on the same page faith-wise, check that you really do believe in the same things and has the same basic principles. Once that is checked then yeah, do take account of the other two. Money makes life easy. Affection makes life sweeter. However, do remember that people can and do change; money can be earned, affection can grow but faith is very hard to shake.


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